i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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