Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
We have so much sex to catch up on
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
