Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
