whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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