he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
