No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Randomize
