I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I'm too high and old for this...
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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