Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
