Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
