TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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