Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
