Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
