Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
