You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Randomize
