you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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