Nicole vs. Life
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize
