Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
