the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
