Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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