brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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