I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
