She's JV to your varsity
I cockslap morals
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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