We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
So vagazzling was a success
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Randomize
