"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Randomize