i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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