We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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