well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
