the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Randomize
