all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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