I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize