It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
