It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
