hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
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