so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
17 year olds will be the death of me.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize