Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Randomize
