you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
