The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
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