he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
