mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Randomize
