# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
