a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
