I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
