and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
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