Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
