Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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