it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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