Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
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