dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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