I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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