What did we do last night that was yellow?
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
